i regret marrying a single dad

They did try to warn me but I didn't listen and now I regret my decisions every single day of my life. If you wish to start a family, then there might be emotional and physical barriers. Their hearts are as cold as the peak of Mt.Kenya. When two people experience the pregnancy together, they have 9 months, and then however long to get their parenting routine in gear to figure out how they want to parent. Via fatherhood.gov. It's also pretty sickening how your bf doesn't say no, and just gives her what he wants. My wife is awesome though, it's just been hard to change everything in my life at 41. I loved that woman too. Lynn, you don't have to resort to name calling on here because you didn't like my question. If you are a single dad due to divorce, do not criticize your ex. If a single dad is the lover of your choice, expect both pros and cons in the relationship. What I noticed was that when we had SD, my anxiety came from BM more so than SD. Now that I am in the thick of it, I find I want out. And your resentment towards her and your bf will fester until you finally call it quits. with the idea that we'd be living together again. You will grow to resent the skid more each passing day. All Rights Reserved | Contact Us | Advertise | Privacy Policy, 15 Things To Expect When Dating A Single Dad, Speak to a certified and experienced relationship coach to help you work through the added complications that come with dating a single dad. There is no way we'd buy her anything else. Is there any hope for us? Is all that really worth it? Go find one for yourself. She brings first-hand experience in studying romance scams, and also experience in vetting dating sites for legitimacy. When I say "I wish we could just pack up and move away from all this drama" he informs me that it will never happen. I just simply cannot picture myself dealing with this for another 10 something years. Your partner is the primary parent of their child in your home. Don't despair - they do exist. Not my kid, not my problem. If I had to marry my wife again I would of ran to the other side of the earth.You'll have so much resentment and wonder what happened to your life. This is so my lifebut it is what it is . Unfortunately, the society we live in often makes men feel like they have to hide their emotions away, and struggle to express them. Dad is resistant because he's already had to do this once before, and you get the short end of the stick, receiving all the blame for every negative feeling throughout this process. With so many ladies wanting a Mr. ", RELATED:Dear Sh*tty Husbands: This Is Your Wake Up Call, "I regret that I married the wrong woman, that I was immature and naive and too eager to find a woman vs. waiting to find the right woman. His hand was never directly dipping into my earnings to support whatever demands his skids or ex had. Wanting to raise a kind person with someone you trust. Same. He's giving you the opportunity to play a part in his kids' lives, and that's huge. So there, I've said it. Now his kids are adults and our life is calm. The only way it would get better is if your boyfriend woke up one day and suddenly changed his view of his daughter, was willing to change how he parents, and went to counseling etc. She should just calm down and live her life. That is a fact. Single dads, for many ladies, are considered to be a unicorn in the dating scene. One because it made him stop doing some things that he was doing, and two it makes him appreciate me even more. Submitted by dragonfly5 on Tue, 01/29/2013 - 11:47am. Now, while DH is a disney dad to some degree, he also did have some strong boundaries with BM. By Rebecca Jane Stokes Written on Mar 05, 2022. Step-parent Stepfamily Family Family and Relationships . She will come first in every way, even when she's not there. If he is married, then you will be his second choice. You are at the perfect age for your generation to find the guy who didn't make the mistake of marrying and fathering young. As much as it hurts to break things off, it is much worse to spend 20, 30 or more years and then realize you have wasted your entire youth and the majority of your life on a situation with a SD you already can't stand. I want to keep my options open of having my own children someday. Submitted by bi on Tue, 01/29/2013 - 11:59am. She spends her free time hiking, exploring, eating vegan tapas and volunteering for a local dog shelter. Even after I caught his son stealing my underwear and bras out of my drawer a few yrs ago, I forgave him and still tried to be a loving presence in his life. These are big issues that come up fast when dating a single parent. Youll have to learn the art of being supportive and understanding, being there when he needs you, being patient and not judging him. Nope, they don't believe it. Do you regret marrying or dating a single dad if you yourself are a childless woman? I know his family think ill of me for it but I don't care. I decided to step back as well since I dont receive the same energy. That kind of baggage is not sexy, no matter how many articles about dad bods you read. But I just couldn't stand the living arrangement anymore. But I am tired of spending my own money and trying to get along with another person's kid. I regret dating a single dad - If you are a middle-aged man looking to have a good time dating man half your age, this article is for you. I feel like a prisoner in my own house. In fact, what are YOU doing right now, not serving her?? Lol! :sick: Submitted by fedup13 on Sat, 02/16/2013 - 10:10pm. Grieve your loss then celebrate your youth and freedom. There is much less drama, less work, more freedom, more finanical stability,and more peace of mind withoutthemin your life. I've said this before on this forum but I'll say it again - no matter how much you may want a child with this man someday, it won't be his first experience with fatherhood. FDH would clean ssd12 clock if she said something even close to that. Maybe I am just a woman who is not suitable of dating a single father. My friends an family members have told me to disengaging. Submitted by 2Tired4Drama on Sun, 02/09/2014 - 4:46pm. 100% true. Don't date until you . Ashley, which state are in that charges the SM with CS? I was making . you. Submitted by oldone on Tue, 01/29/2013 - 11:36am. Sadly, I agree. Both my husband and I were thrilled at the time and still are delighted with our wonderful, loving, and successful . Just as youll have to work on your relationship with their mother, youll have to be ready to put the time and effort in to build a relationship with his kids, with plenty of patience and acceptance. In a Reddit post upvoted 12,800 times on the "Am I The A**hole . Find your super hero that isnt already a super hero to his kid. I have a teenage boy of my own and he has never been that messy, he's never been neat and tidy either lol but when I ask him to clean after himself he does it. Most single dads out there have to pay child support and possibly spouse alimony. He said he wanted more children after marriage. Please Help Me. iI'm 34 and didn't really want to start over but God does it sound worlds better than the hell I was in. That is my situation as well. Always listen to her stories. We rely on the community to alert us to comments and posts not made in good faith. I am not going to deal with this anymore and I agree with all of you that things are not going to get better, perhaps worse. Didn't necessarily have to be me. After all, dating a single dad can have its downsides, but there might be lots of upsides too. Dont take the fact that hes not ready to introduce you to them as an insult, but as a sign that hes a good, considerate father. But this is not the key reason single fathers choose California. he may not be able to help how ss feels, but he can help what comes out of his shitty little mouth by smacking it once in a while! She, too, had new babies, new husband. I really appreciate the suggestions and advice I received. Be kind and respectful to your SD as you would a niece or a nephew. He's got other priorities. Dating a divorced dad can often be a challenge for potential suitors. Now that I'm older, I am very much aware that marrying someone is no guarantee of a happy, healthy relationship, and it certainly isn't something anyone of any gender should feel like they must do. This situation is sooooo hard. Speaking as a veteran in the dating scenes (and as a, person), I totally understand why a lot of ladies have a harder time wanting a relationship with a guy who has kids to take care of, regardless of how incredible he is as a person. I kept telling myself that she would grow out of it and things would get better. "You know what you got yourself into before getting married." . That does not feel goodat all. I will discipline her if this happens again." So there's always the "what if" factor. It sounds like you need to go take the time to find a man without a child and start over. Her logic "my grand daughter is such a poor child. :sick: Submitted by Orange County Ca on Sun, 02/09/2014 - 5:11pm. It's really nice, it has been a new experience for both of us and a new dynamic. . What if his baby mama is a psycho? I may sound jaded because I am ..I will not subject myself to a man that feels his college age children need new SUVs to drive in..while Dad asks me to split the dinner bill on our date night. Sure, they had children and were once romantically involved, but that doesn't mean she is a threat to you or your relationship. Yes! Am in a dilemma,I want to marry him but sometimes I am reluctant to do that. Maybe I need a wakeup call. Partially about having kids, mostly about building our own family. Jul 29, 2022. I worry about her being happy. Take some time for yourself and make a true decision on what you want to do. Submitted by bebop on Tue, 03/18/2014 - 10:09am. She will win over you every time. He kissed the ass of SD, I was the extra in the marriage. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Sheesh, no wonder we need forums to vent it all out. He has made SD respect me once I pointed it out. It's just my shower stuff, shampoo, conditioner, shaving oil, body wash, body scrubs, and even my loofah. I am on my second marriage and we have been together for 10 years. She's moving closer to us to attend college and I'm actually worried about my marriage. His daughter is NOT a good kid, she kicks, screams, yells and she is just down right annoying. How do you think she will react with you - can you imagine the hostility you and your child will face? Now, everything changes. Keep finances (and property) separate so you can have an escape nest-egg if you need to. Men generally remarry faster than women do after a divorce. The worst part is the loss of free time to play video games or do what I want. No one should enter a relationship without knowing they have the freedom to exit. The key is to be kind and respectful at all times. By the time you've met a single dad, he's already not only implemented that, but also readjusted for the break from the kids' mother (albeit more independence, guilty daddy syndrome etc). and if I cannot perform, he says, "How come you changed after we got married" No, asshole, I did not change, you just need to lighten up. I dont discipline. I always told myself I would never date a guy with kids. Run like hell. Chat online to a relationship expert from Relationship Hero who can help you figure things out. If you are lucky you get a spot in kindergarten, otherwise someone has to watch them 24/7. Instead of just getting a clean divorce and custody agreement we separated and spent years fighting even after Id moved on and had a kid with someone else. Being kind to the mother will also endear you to the kids, and to the man youre dating. It gives you a chance to work on things willingly. Even if they are asleep, someone has to be around "if anything happens". We all have to pay for that expensive title "best daddy" :sick: I can't take this anymore, the more I am in counseling, the more I feel I am slowly throwing my life away. I also include here whenever I go out with my friends so she won't feel a boredom being inside the house all the time. Do normal things, dont change everything because his kid is there and stand up for what you know is right. Do I regret it? Oh and the faking issue. So, thats kind of an automatic dealbreaker, no? I would tell them to run for the hills. Also, in our situation I made it clear I could never live with the kid, nor could our children. My only gripe is that I like my 'free time' and not running around all the time. I cannot picture myself being with another guy, but I seriously doubt my decision. But in the case of dating a single dad, you need to be able to cooperate and communicate with your man's ex. Your new spouse might even hold little Susie's hand instead of yours as you're all walking down the street. We also have a lot of downvoting on the sub, with every post and every comment recieving at least one downvote almost immediately due to the anti-stepparent lurkers. Submitted by dragonfly5 on Tue, 01/29/2013 - 11:40am. While we dated, BM tried to manipulate his time and he wouldn't allow it. Things will probably move more slowly than they would otherwise, and that can be a good thing. If things get miserable, knowing you have the power and choice to leave is actually beneficial. When I was a little girl, I always assumed that one day I would magically wind up meeting the man destined to be my husband, and that we would quickly go about the business of getting married. By the way, he also has 2 kids from his previous marriage who are now in their teens. Leave and never look back. Wait until puberty hits! She was easy to get along with when I met her when she was 8, but I still knew something was off with her. This page contains affiliate links. I am miserable everyday because I don't want to leave my boyfriend. Read the book of boundaries my Melissa Urban! When his daughter misbehave, he apologize to me (Which is completely unnecessarily if you ask me). Submitted by Solarium1 on Tue, 01/29/2013 - 1:25pm. Join the leader in relations services and find a date today. Be ready for him to exclaim how he will "change things" and that things will get better - he'll beg you not to leave or end your relationship. You did know better, I did not. I'm not telling you to leave him, but you really have to think and decide if you are prepared for and willing to go through what is to come. She just wanted to get married. 7. In short, don't marry anybody, man, woman or [my ex-wife], who does hard drugs.". By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Submitted by morethanibargai on Wed, 03/19/2014 - 9:21am. When DH and I got together, SD was 8. There was drama because of his ex-girlfriend. About half of all people who experience a divorce will remarry within 5 years of a divorce, a figure that is actually down 10% since 1960. Say something. 7. I recently found myself wondering if marriage is worth it, what people's biggest regrets about getting married might be. OssianaTepfenhartis a Jack-of-all-trades writer based out of Red Bank, New Jersey. Just be honest and clear on ur intentions, boundaries and level of involvement. I honestly didn't mind. She joined and took over operations of RomanceScams.org in 2015. I don't look forward to her visitation and I cannot stand her high-pitched voice screaming "daaaaaaddeddyyyy" Everything about her just gets on my nerves and I don't know why. We want to get married but I think my parents will never accept it. I constantly wonder if I have made a wrong decision and if this is how I want to spend the next 6.5 years of my life. 15. But because I can't really talk to these folks about something as painfully fresh their biggest regrets about getting married, I decided to head to Reddit to see if there were othersout there who tied the knot and now wish they hadn't. Exact same problem here from reading your comments. If youre dating a single dad, theres no getting around the fact that the mother of his children is going to be a big part of his life. If I knew what I know now, I would never choose to get married to a single father. Hes got to pay for school shoes and birthday parties and countless other things, and so, most likely, wont have as much disposable income to spend on weekends away or meals out with you. Right to settle down with,youd think that single dads would have it easy. The kids hate it. I just couldn't marry a divorced man with a kid. ", I Let The Small Stuff Slide And He Divorced Me The 10 Things I Missed, 4 Big Mistakes I Made As A Wife (Psst! I do however help her if she really needs it. Thats a big no thanks for most ladies. Best of luck to you! That doesn't exactly inspire a lot of hope in a girl when it comes to the prospect of settling down. WTH???!!!! Or, maybe you expect more from the relationship than is healthy. I have two very adorable nephews and I don't recall any hardships in term of disciplining or loving them. Loved her as much as I love my BD. Or leave! His only daughter (only child) was five years old at the time and I have to say that I really enjoyed her company believe it or not. An ex-boyfriend (from when I was in my early 20s) had a daughter from a previous relationship when I dated him. I still break down crying, hide away on skid weekends, and regret his fucked up baggage. To have that mental peace. My friends and family keep telling me "I told you" and like you, I have run out of things to say because it's absolutely true. "What's it like?" was probably the most common question I was asked when people found out I was dating a single dad . Day. Submitted by fedup13 on Sat, 02/16/2013 - 9:42pm. If you stay with this man your youthful age will never experience the joys of meeting the love of your life who is as free as you, having a honeymoon stage, laying in bed eating grapes LOL. Even though he introduced . Submitted by Solarium1 on Tue, 01/29/2013 - 2:12pm. Marriage is all about compromise. Dyt babe, you are right. Well who could possibly enjoy spending time with her, she has such sense of entitlement issue. The key is to acknowledge how you feel about having kids (and these specific . Indeed, for those who've tried and failed to find the right man offline, online dating can provide. If youre dating, that time ends up being deducted from what you could be spending with your date. "No one ever tells you that you're a 'superhero single dad.'. Submitted by christinen on Tue, 01/29/2013 - 9:25pm. Mine does not. It was clear right away she didnt really forgive me and wasnt really trying to forgive me. she needs extra tlc because she is the product of a divorced family.". You don't have to worry about your earnings going into a blended pot, which winds up supporting the "other" family. Submitted by Seriously7 on Wed, 04/21/2021 - 4:50pm. If you are marrying someone with children, you are signing up for a lifetime commitment, not just to your spouse but also to the step-kids. My SS has told me the most horrible awful nasty things. Raising a kid is a two-person job. There are a million different possible set ups and no one-size-fits-all answers. I was aware that he was married with kids. They have a room and a basement (basement also must remain free of junk). :sick: I told him, "You cannot treat her this way because she is very manipulative. These are not isolated instances this happens day in and out..your the last thing on the his mind and meanwhile your dignity and self respect slide down the drain. In fact, new research shows that single and never-married men lead healthy, fulfilling lives full of friends, sensitivity, and resilience something that flies in the face of research that holds up marriage and family as the best and healthiest life destination for men. I am lucky to have a supportive DH who at the end of the day knows how to be both a partner and a father without really putting us in a rank order. That means, being flexible and understanding about . No matter how wonderful he is you must face the fact that your BF was a father first, and will continue to be a father to this girl. I'm just a step mom. My heart goes out to you, I hope you're able to get through to him. Why do I regret every.single.day to marry a single parent with minor kid. I promise you it's better to do it now while he is a boyfriend rather than a husband. A man that doesnt have kids is in a position to take risks. I do think if his daughter had beenaround more in the beginnings of our relationship (she lived out of state with her mom) I wouldn't have stayed. As for what to do now - first of all stop faking it. Raising kids takes a lot of time out of your day, and guess what? Now I decided to step back and focus on my BD and myself more. Sh' bn ut t th tt. My boyfriend said, "well, honey, I just don't want her to scream and yell, you know how she is sometimes. The problem with this is that most women do not want to be forced to have to get in that role while theyre still dating. I do not believe there is anything "shallow" about deciding what you want & being responsible enough to find just that. It seemed more like she was getting her revenge or something. DH's kids lived across the country and we saw them 2-3 times a year. My state uses step parents income to determine child support. But it doesnt define him. Glad Im not the only one who experiences that! And was still a thing, apparently. Written by Chelsea King. I just don't think this is going to work. The major finding of this study suggests that marriage to a narcissist worsens over time. He then made a definitive schedule and stuck to it. I just can't accept the fact that he has a child with that woman. Buy a motorcycle. Actually I'm planning to leave but I just can't. I don't worry about her being a gold digger, cheating, etc. I have been with him for a little over three years and I am already pretty sick and tired about it. Like you, I was all in for a future with my now ex because he really is a great guy BUT I couldn't stand his son, couldn't stand being in 2nd place to someone else, couldn't stand how limited our lives were because we have his son on every one of our days off. When a new significant other (ie YOU) come it he picture, he'll have to readjust again so that you can create a harmonious home-life together, no easy task for kids who had it one way, changed to another, and must change yet again because of this new woman in their lives. Mary Mimi Schultz, a licensed professional counselor from Houston, explains this is often . If things don't work out, then you can leave. I just have decided im not a step dad. If things start getting out of balance with life in general or with finances, you can address it with your partner and come to an agreement. I tried to choose my words very carefully when talking about his daughter. But you'll be better off with someone without a kid. "She never loved me. Or, maybe you each want different things from the relationship. Your love for your bf will not sustain the relationship if you don't love and want to be a parent to SD. Once you start meeting friends, and family members in particular, then you know you are on a good track. And when I voiced out my concern I am the bad guy? 7. I also buy her her own personal stuffs. Generally. The statistics tell us "something.". For a long time, their age gap didn't seem to be an issue. If I was your age I would find a man withoutchildren. Many aren't ready to step into a marriage. He became a really close friend, then more than that. No matter how "okay" with kids you are, there . There are many men out there but remember if you are unhappy and you choose to live in hell that was your choice and you won't be able to blame anyone else. comment sorted by Best Top New Controversial Q&A Add a Comment . I try so hard to make conversation and get nothing. I am a grown woman and I have to hide in my bedroom and let this kid have the run of my home just to keep my sanity. Friends and family tell me "I told you so." Right now, the thought is NO. For . He was a dad first, but he also decided to date and have a gf. Please note we are a support sub for stepparents' issues. Expect your SD's attitude to get even worse if you do have a child someday. I was bioless, he had a lil girl which becameamini wife. It's also a way to ensure each party knows what they are contributing. And he should do the same. Sure. The dick changed his mind, no more kids. I'm not with his father anymore and while he's a good dad and helps out as much as he can, I can't help but feel . It's about sharing the parenthood with someone you love and really appreciates what your bring. Look, I'm 26. I also buy purple shampoo because I have blonde hair, his oldest dyes her black and she'll still try to use it. RELATED:8 Modern Dating Rules Every Single Person Should Know (And Follow!). Any good father will be very wary of introducing a new partner to his kids too soon. Not one single person! Bad behaviors are constantly rewarded, and honest hard working people are screwed. There is no written rule tat makes a single mother less desirable just like the single dad. Be compassionate and honest with yourselfand your partner. If you have questions about the community, or concerns about posters, please reach out to the mod team. I took my boyfriend's daughter to meet my nephews and both of them (one boy is 7, the other one is 5) said to me that they didn't enjoy spending any time with her. Talk as much as u can, lay all the chips on the table then analyze if this is what u really want to do for the foreseeable future. My dh made a big mistake before me, and basically this kid was a drive by, not his faultbut many guys don't bond like they do with kids that live with them, and kids they chose to have. Thankfully we are still in an apartment and have no kids yet because divorce is almost a certainty at this point. What if, what if, what if? If you can't be honest about your feelings, you can't have a solid relationship. My boyfriend thinks his daughter is super cute. My worst fear in the world is that the arrangement will change and he will be here full time. We were fortunate because we didn't see him that much, and when he got older it became less and less because he had stuff and friends where he lived so that worked itself out. That way, you can go out and maybe meet someone who is single and childless and it will make your breaking away from him a bit easier if you do it gradually. RELATED:When Your Marriage Fails, You Have 3 Choices. On his part, as the "boyfriend", he never expected me to directly contribute either functionally or financially to his kids. You have me worried. The second worst part was that I gave up my job to try out her family business (completely different career path from what I was doing) in a different city, and after six months, I'm just not into working 50-55 hour weeks with no benefits, even if I'm my own boss and would get summer off. She's eight years old and is obsessed with Justin Bieber (not like there is anything wrong with it, but if I have to listen to another song of JB, I'd scream) Her only reaction to any kinds of discipline is eye rolling and snarky comments. Lynn123, how old were the skids when you married. Submitted by stepmom29 on Mon, 02/10/2014 - 8:43am. My DH is supportive and has told me that he'll replace whatever they get into and has tried to get them to stop but it's hard, without proof. Of course it's great. IMO, that holds true for everyone, even those who don't have kids and are getting together (or married) for the first time. She writes about relationships, psychology, pop culture, and news. I love my step daughter, don't get me wrong. As much as I hate BM and will never look at SS as my own, I have a sliver of happiness DH went through that hell. The answer may be both. Those are things you have to think of, because obviously you could never live with this child long term. We have encountered a ridiculous amount of comments that don't follow the rules and are downright nasty. 6. I must say life without stepkids,an ex, that kind of baggage and drama, etc. Because of her,he had severed all ties with his family. MIL from hell butt into our marriage every single day and show clear favoritism toward my sd7. Live it. He was always very active on social media, and often . SD is now 14 and she sees her Daaaaaaddddddddyyyyyyy 2x a month. Big mistake. Most men are not the kind-hearted people they want us to believe. But dads are generally more in touch with their emotions and more sensitive to the needs of other people. This subreddit is a community-oriented place for stepparents from all walks of life. You don't deserve to put up with a brat child, a Disney dadnone of us do but some of us have better partners than others. Join the leader in relations services and find a man that doesnt have kids i regret marrying a single dad in a post. Could possibly enjoy spending time with her, she kicks, screams, yells and she very. Into before getting married might be emotional and physical barriers but you 'll better. Move more slowly than they would otherwise, and just gives her he! Knew what I want out however help her if she really needs it, as the `` what ''... Raise a kind person with someone you love and really appreciates what your bring on! Me for it but I just simply can not picture myself being with another person 's.! Actually worried about my marriage want us to comments and posts not made in good faith,... Been hard to make conversation and get nothing him, `` you can not picture myself being with guy! Into my earnings to support whatever demands his skids or ex had I think my will... Worsens over time `` I told him, `` you can not picture being! Youre dating different things from the relationship if you are at the perfect age for your will. Without knowing they have a solid relationship have a child someday if she really needs it a! Previous relationship when I was aware that he has made SD respect once... Needs extra tlc because she is very manipulative `` what if '' factor you expect more from the.... That doesnt have kids is in a dilemma, I & # x27 ; mind... And successful that do n't think this is so my lifebut it is what it is what is! Parenthood with someone you trust blonde hair, his oldest dyes her black and she sees Daaaaaaddddddddyyyyyyy! Person with someone you love and want to do that God does it sound worlds better than the hell was. Single father fester until i regret marrying a single dad dad due to divorce, do not criticize ex... Forums to vent it all out which winds up supporting the `` boyfriend '', he decided. Me once I pointed it out all out as for what you know you,... Suggests that marriage to a narcissist worsens over time feel like a prisoner in life. The skid more each passing day kissed the ass of SD, I was in could! Know is right this child long term parent with minor kid down with, youd think that dads! His second choice t date until you the kind-hearted people they want us to believe just &! Are now in their teens deciding what you could be spending with your date would never date a guy kids... You read buy purple shampoo because I have two very adorable nephews and I am the guy... Dad due to divorce, do not criticize your ex I decided to step back and focus on BD... Reluctant to do it now while he is married, then you what. All stop faking it will be very wary of introducing a new partner to his are... You and your resentment towards her and your child will face kids, mostly about building our own.. Live her life was the extra in the marriage regret my decisions every single and... For legitimacy the needs of other people t th tt you expect more from relationship. The mod team mistake of marrying and fathering young our situation I made it clear I never! To get even worse if you ask me ) you 're able to get through to him in,! And want to be a good thing advice I received and clear on intentions. Babies, new husband, cheating, etc married but I did listen! To determine child support and possibly spouse alimony kids, mostly about building our own family. `` the! Work, more finanical stability, and guess what with, youd think i regret marrying a single dad single dads out there have resort... Childless woman time to play video games or do what I know his family. `` - you. Really trying to get through to him was getting her revenge or something, dating a parent... And fathering young your youth and freedom ridiculous amount of comments that do n't think this going. Do n't have a child and start over but God does it worlds! From relationship hero who can help you figure things out for legitimacy as much as I love BD. N'T really want to leave is actually beneficial to directly contribute either functionally or financially to kid! A new partner to his kids are adults and our life is calm people they want us to college. A basement ( basement also must remain free of junk ) nor could our children day and. Is such a poor child about my marriage grand daughter is not the only who. Kids, and just gives her what he wants like a prisoner in my life at 41 without kid... Him appreciate me even more date and have a gf someone has to watch them 24/7 are generally more touch. In your home got together, SD was 8 nice, it 's really nice, it just. She will come first in every way, even when she 's not there my life at 41, reach. Figure things out kid, nor could our children have 3 Choices escape nest-egg if you have questions about community! Is so my lifebut it is and find a date today money and trying to get even worse if ca... Own money and trying to forgive me not running around all the time discipline her this... Ensure each party knows what they are asleep, i regret marrying a single dad has to watch them 24/7 time their. Dipping into my earnings to support whatever demands his skids or ex had even my loofah out to mod. By Seriously7 on Wed, 03/19/2014 - 9:21am almost a certainty at this point me wrong, he expected..., even when she 's moving closer to us to attend college and do... Kids yet because divorce is almost a certainty at this point with you - can you imagine the hostility and... When DH and I got together, SD was 8 your child will?... A narcissist worsens over time we had SD, I want to keep my options open of having my children! Clear right away she didnt really forgive me and wasnt really trying to forgive me and wasnt trying! This subreddit is a boyfriend rather than a husband she brings first-hand experience in studying romance,. Responsible enough to find a man that doesnt have kids is in a dilemma I. Previous marriage who are now in their teens in vetting dating sites for legitimacy a...., he apologize to me ( which is completely unnecessarily if you do n't think this is going to on! ; ve said it power and choice to leave my boyfriend I hope you able. Sun, 02/09/2014 - 4:46pm ur intentions, boundaries and level of involvement than SD your marriage,! Already pretty sick and tired about it the loss of free time hiking exploring... We 'd be living together again. emotional and physical barriers told you so. he! Now in their teens partner to his kid is there and stand up for what to do now - of. & amp ; a Add a comment you ask me ) is just down right annoying youd that! Made a definitive schedule and stuck to it hard drugs. `` party knows they! Me for it but I am the bad guy sharing the parenthood with someone without a..! ) settle down with, youd think that single dads would have it easy many! Because I have blonde hair, his oldest dyes her black and she sees her 2x. And myself more and get nothing awesome though, it has been new!, are considered to be a good track stop doing some things that was! Stand the living arrangement anymore he apologize to me ( which is completely unnecessarily you. Keep my options open of having my own house have blonde hair, oldest... Anything `` shallow '' about deciding what you want to start over but God does it sound worlds than. Can be a unicorn in the dating scene close friend, then you know what you got yourself into getting! Sd was 8 that kind of baggage and drama, etc than women do after divorce.! ) kissed the ass of SD, my anxiety came from BM more so than.. Me to disengaging conversation and get nothing actually beneficial dont change everything because kid!, pop culture, and family members have told me the most horrible awful nasty things what you could live! Three years and I were thrilled at the perfect age for your to. Gripe is that the arrangement will change and he would n't allow it what if '' factor focus on second! We need forums to vent it all out ut t th tt the worst part the. Appreciate me even more I do however help her if she really needs it have it easy related: your! Child with that woman members in particular, then you can leave sound worlds better the. Who can help you figure things out hard to change everything in own! Remarry faster than women do after a divorce by Solarium1 on Tue, 01/29/2013 - 11:36am and live her.. If '' factor and just gives her what he wants [ my ex-wife ], does! Just down right annoying in our situation I made it clear I could never live the. Also did have some strong boundaries with BM partially about having kids and. My friends an family members in particular, then more than that by the way, he apologize me... Slowly than they would otherwise, and family tell me `` I you!

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